Fertie’s Rap
When we first discovered that Anna was pregnant I wrote this rap as a way of letting some of our family members know. This is from the perspective of our child, who we call Fertie (bonus points to you if you can guess why…). Thought I’d share it with you, here it is:
Allow me to introduce myself
I am the one, the only LIL FERTIE
Yo yo yo yo yo
Here we go
Who is the greatest lil embryo
As I begin to grow, you won’t stop my flow
I’m a proverbial bond bout to go into escrow
So watch out for me when I come around
I’ll make everything in your life turn upside down
One day I’ll see the world and take its crown
For now this womb is Lil Fertie’s hometown
My rhymes terrify they make you psychotic
You can find me chilling out in the sac of amniotic
Don’t defy me, I’m your new neighbor
If I get too excited I may induce labor
Even though I barely exist
There’s no way you can’t resist
Cuz with a flick of the wrist, I’ll give ya the gist
I’m about to make my way to #1 on your top 5 list
All this being said, I know you’ll love me
I’m in utero now, I’ll come out eventually
I’ll walk around and you can meet me
But for now give a holla to Anna’s belly